A List
I wanted to make a list because we have a list category on this blog, but I couldnt decide on a topic for the list. So, I just decided to make a list of list topics. If you want to see an actual list of any of the topics just let me know.
1. The most annoying puzzles ever put into video games
2. The douchiest foods
3. Meaningless distinctions
4. Uniforms that used to be masculine but now just look gay
5. Pornstars with alliterative names
6. Words that did not exist 50 years ago
7. Technology the world could do without
8. The most geometric landmarks
9. People I would like to see in an argument with Rain Man
10. The gayest prime numbers
11. Goofiest serial killers
12. The best things to put alcohol in
13. Euphemisms that aren’t
14. Superheroines I would have sex with
15. Best ways to die
16. Classic books that actually suck but no one is willing to say it
17. Zombie videogames that still managed to suck
18. Things that are easier to talk about drunk
19. The best things about a Ruben
20. Good places for a breakup
21. Funny combinations of animals
22. Reasons to wear a bolo or a beret (but never both)
23. Grammatical rules that changed the world
24. Why baseball cards are no longer even as cool as Pokemon cards
25. Fads that we knew were bad even at the time but participated in regardless
26. The nerdiest shows on television
27. Millionaires I would mail glitter-filled letters to
28. Songs to make love to
29. Why it is difficult to figure out when to end a list of lists
30. The satisfactory nature of numbers that are multiples of ten
October 20th, 2009 at 12:07 am
Connellee,
This is ridiculous. However, a few of these are appealing to me. I would totally read numbers 4 (? I’m curious), 16 (because I want to see if you’d put Steinbeck on there. I don’t appreciate Steinbeck), 19 (I’m hungry), 21, 22, and 25 (no special reasons).
Love,
Tara
October 20th, 2009 at 4:02 pm
For you T-dizz. Maybe I will make full lists soon enough, but for now a cocktease.
4: any uniform worn by the village people
16: Thomas Hardy and Jane Austen are boring as sinlessness. There just isnt enough adversity in England to weave a good yarn. The Russians on the other hand had more than enough oppression to be good story tellers. Steinbeck can make a gun fight sound like tax law, but it is at least beautiful and poignant writing.
19: saurkraut and marbled rye; come on, you knew that
21: even when I wrote this one, I wasnt sure whether I was talking about one creature comprised of several creature’s attributes, like manbearpig or just animals I would like to get together in a room, so I’ll give you one of each. I think a coral snake combined with a dog would be sweet. It would chase its own tail, catch it, and look like a tilt-a-whirl as it spun around. Or, I would like to see one bonobo monkey, two hyenas, 14 prarie dogs, a giraffe, and one sleepy puppy in a room.
22: bolo: your mustache takes up more than 20% of your face. beret: you have just escaped from jail and you want to blend in as a mime.
25: Pogs
And woman, my name is Kirk or something; I’ve got a reputation to maintain. Talking about my pot-addled mind is not going to impress employers.
Love you too pookie’s pookie.
October 21st, 2009 at 11:29 pm
Just FYI T-Dizz, I dont think you picked a single one of my favorites from the list. I really liked 2, 9, 13, and 23. If anyone has any ideas for any of the topics, post them. I’d love to see who you want to argue with Rain Man or what you consider douchy foods. I’m thinking asparagus.